The questions people are too embarrassed to ask.

No — and not as a matter of politeness. How long it has been is clinically useful information and nothing else. It tells us where to start.

Long gaps are one of the most common things we see. You will not be the worst case anyone has met, and you will not be spoken to as though you were.

No. Being lectured is a reason people stop attending, which makes it actively counterproductive. If there is something practical that would help your teeth, you will be told once, plainly, as information — and only if you want to hear it.

Not at the first appointment if you are not ready. Some people need one visit purely to talk, with no examination at all. Say so when you book, or when you arrive, and that is what happens.

You agree a stop signal before anything begins — usually a raised hand. When you use it, everything stops immediately, not at a convenient point.

Panicking is not an emergency and it is not embarrassing. We stop, you sit up, you get your breath back, and then you decide whether to continue or leave. Ending an appointment early is a legitimate outcome, not a failure.

Then you cry, and it is treated as unremarkable — because it is. It happens regularly, most often from relief rather than distress. Nobody will make anything of it.

Honest answer: an examination should not hurt at all. Treatment on a numb tooth should not hurt either, though you will feel pressure, vibration and water — sensations people often interpret as pain when they are braced for it.

Where it does go wrong is when numbing is rushed or incomplete. So it is checked before starting, and if you tell us an area is not numb you will be believed and given more rather than encouraged to push on.

Very common and rarely mentioned unprompted, so do mention it. It can be managed with positioning, smaller instruments, breathing through the nose, working in shorter bursts, and — where needed — inhalation sedation, which tends to dampen the reflex considerably.

Then say that first, because it changes the approach. Numbing gel goes on beforehand so the site is already numb, nothing is passed across your line of sight, and some practices use a computer-controlled pen-shaped device that neither looks nor feels like a syringe.

Inhalation sedation before the injection is also an option, and it is a common combination for exactly this reason. See making it easier.

No. They are sometimes necessary to see decay or bone loss that a mirror cannot, and you will be told why they are being suggested — but you can decline or defer them. Any consequence of not having them will be explained rather than used as pressure.

Yes, and they can stay in the room. For oral or IV sedation an escort is not merely allowed but required — someone has to bring you and take you home.

Yes. Ask for a familiarisation visit. You see the room, meet the team, ask questions and leave. For a lot of people this is what makes the second appointment possible.

Yes. Tell us you would rather be contacted by email or text and that is what we will use. For a fair number of people the phone call is the single biggest barrier, so it is a completely normal request.

You get the cost of the first appointment before you book it, and a written plan with prices before any treatment is agreed. No treatment gets started on a “we’ll see” basis.

If cost is itself part of the dread, say so — the plan can be sequenced so the urgent work happens first and the rest is spread out.

Ask us when you get in touch and you will get a straight answer for your situation before committing to anything.

As general context: NHS dentistry does fund treatment, but access to sedation on the NHS purely for anxiety is limited and varies by area, so it is often a private cost. Either way you should never be in a position of discovering the price afterwards.

Then you already know how this goes, and so do we. Cancelling is a symptom of the thing you are asking for help with — it is not evidence that you are wasting anyone’s time.

If it helps, say up front that you have cancelled before. It usually leads to a first appointment designed to be easier to actually attend.

Yes, and plenty of people do. A question with no appointment attached is a perfectly good reason to get in touch. Nobody will chase you.